Message in Our Marriage

As I am making the plans for our big day, I have found myself hitting several brick walls. 

When Harold and I started courting, we would go out once a week and have date nights.  Many times he would ask me "What do you want to do?" 

I couldn't give him many answers, because I didn't always know what I wanted to do.  I asked "Whatever you want to do, I'll join you." 

When planning life after college, I never really settled on what I wanted to do.  Not to brag on being selfless, but I didn't give much thought into what I wanted to do with my life.  I didn't have a Peace with anything. 

I came to a point in life where my response was "Whatever God called me to do."  I lived day to day, working where I was at, waiting for God to reveal the next area of life. 

Now that I am preparing for marriage with a wonderful, God-fearing man, I am finding this extremely difficult. 

What do I want? 

I have narrowed down a few big things already...you know...like colors, venues, location of wedding, stuff like that.  But in the details, things that don't always matter to me, I am finding it real hard to make a choice. 

Deep down, what Harold and I really want, is for the message of our marriage to be clear.  It isn't about us being served and honored in this time.  It's about how we are committing to serving God.  It's about our proclamation to everyone that our big day is God's day for us.  Our lives after the ceremony shouldn't be were we start to honor God in our marriage, but our preparation and the day itself should be a proclamation of how great our God is.  Our friendship, courting, and engagement should show it. 

That is what I really want.  I want God to be glorified.  I want the details to be given to Him and let God make our day special.  He has provided already with the abundance of support and help we both have received thus far.  In the planning, Harold and I have found many blessings.  I have no reason to complain or be upset with all that God has provided. 

Our big day is God's big day for us, and reflecting on how Harold and I have been called and drawn to each other is nothing but an act of God.  We are being joined to serve Him together.  Our day should honor that above all. 

Above what I want is what God wants.  He will reveal my heart to me in its time.  He already has, and I know He will be faithful to continue to do so.