My Dear Esther

Today, I went to the Hospice House in Waterloo to visit a friend whom I made during my internship and job.  She is a dear old woman named Esther, and she has basically become a Grandma/good friend to me.  She had been a survivor of heart failure, and was expected to pass well before my internship started up.  She was given a second chance by God, and I fully believe that second chance was for me. 

During my internship, I had been stressed and pulled everywhere with my life.  This woman prayed for me and reminded me of the reason for struggles.  Her faith had really encouraged me, and I really loved the chances we got to sit down and chat about life with each other.  Esther was always asking about my progress emotionally and spiritually, and I was not afraid to inform her of every detail because I knew I was telling a heart that would earnestly pray for everything I told her. 

Now, it's my turn to be that person for her.  Esther had been suffering from back and abdominal pain for a while now, and I was told that she is suffering from renal failure.  Her kidneys are shutting down, her appetite is gone, and her energy level today was barely existent.  She couldn't keep her eyes open, but her grip on my hand tightened as I sat by her bedside.  She remembered who I was and let me pray over her before I left.  I had done this Monday as well, and it really meant the world to her that I had come to visit.  Today, she started the prayer.  As I finished, her grip tightened even more. 

As I watched my dear friend lay there with her body failing, I had many thoughts run through my mind.  Many things I wanted to tell her.  I wanted her to know how much I appreciated her being there for me.  I wanted her to see success in my struggles, and I want her to really see what her and I had been patiently waiting and praying for in my life. 

If you are reading this, please keep this woman and her family in your prayers.  I don't know how much longer I will have to visit Esther, and I am going tomorrow to the Hospice Home with the attitude that I may not see her again down here on Earth.  I cry thinking about losing her, but rejoice that her pain will soon end.  Her confusion and suffering will soon come to a close, and our Heavenly Father will cradle my friend's spirit up to His presence...where she will never suffer again. 

Dear Esther,
I can't even begin to tell you how much I appreciate your life.  Thank you for sharing your many poems with me, reflecting your thoughts during your near-death struggles.  Thank you for the encouragement and perseverance that I needed to keep moving when my body couldn't.  Thank you for your countless prayers, thoughts, and hugs.  Thank you for making me feel beautiful and worth it.  Thank you for the laughs, the music, the tears, the memories, and the lives you and I helped change together.  Thank you for your faith.  Your faith made mine stronger.  Your trust made mine exist more.  Your love made me blossom.  Your hope for my future made my hope grow.  Esther, tell Jesus "Hi" for me.  I will someday join you there.  I celebrate in your soon-to-come entrance into our Creator's presence, and rejoice in the fact that I was able to know you. 

Your dear friend and adopted grandchild in Christ,
Kat

Jesus, keep my dear Esther close to your heart tonight.  Comfort her, love her, relieve her.  If it be your will to take her life into your kingdom soon, do so with little struggle.  I pray she may be gently lifted toward you, with little effort at all.  Give her peace, rest, and an anticipation to finally see you face to face.  Oh Lord, what a joyous sight to see...Esther's face full of joy...to finally see her Lover face to face...to finally see the Creator of it all...the Messiah...the King of King's and Lord of Lords...Prince of Peace.  God...do not forsake your daughter Esther tonight.  May her spirit find rest and her body find relief.  I pray this because I know you can do all things Jesus, and I ask this as a friend who hurts for the suffering...give her rest. 

I love you Jesus.
Amen.