My Pseudo Vacation

I had given myself a few days off my normal day job to enjoy life and branch into things I have not been able to do.  I took this time to reflect on the things that I really enjoyed doing, but didn't even sit back to do.  Song writing was one of these things, and studying different topical questions that I couldn't ever sit down and look into.

Mainly, I wanted to quiet myself.
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."  I Peter 3:3-4 

Okay...I am thinking to myself "Well, I don't think my spirit is actually as 'quiet' as this passage expresses..."  I am a pretty rowdy girl at times...in fact I wouldn't really classify myself as 'quiet' or 'gentle' most of the time.  But really, I sat and thought about this.  What does it mean for me to be quiet and gentle in spirit?   Just because I am not the introverted girl sitting in a corner by herself keeping her voice down to a minimum...am I still quiet and gentle in spirit?  If not, how can I be?


Do I obtain this spirit by not keeping myself busy?  Well, I wouldn't think so.  Let's look at Proverbs 31.  Here are little snippets of this chapter that describes a wife of noble character:
"She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls." (15)
"She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks." (17)
"She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy." (20)
"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come." (25)

• This woman is working hard!  Verse 25 already tells me that this girl isn't sitting around looking pretty and petite.  And thank goodness she is laughing!  Especially at the days to come...she isn't worried or fretting.  Maybe this is part of that gentle spirit...

Do I have a quiet and gentle spirit by just...being quiet?  Not sure how I can do this...I am a loud person most of the time...especially when I am around good friends and want to keep a light mood.  Is this such a bad thing?  I don't think me being quiet gives me a "quiet" spirit.  Here is why:

"A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." Proverbs 17:22
"Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue."  Proverbs 17:28
"Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn." Romans 12:15
All the Psalms...just saying. 
"Speak to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs.  Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord., always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."  Ephesians 5:19-21
"An evil man is snared by his own sin, but a righteous one can sing and be glad." Proverbs 29:5

Now, when it comes to a quiet and gentle spirit, let me just unload all these verses that I have found that I feel God is telling me to consider with a quiet and gentle spirit...especially the last three characters listed: (Sorry, you'll have to open your Bibles and look these up.  It's going to be too much to write out for me)

Romans 8:25; 12:9-16; 14:1
Colossians 3:12, 15, 17; 4:2 and 6
I Thessalonians 4:11; 5:14, 16
Ephesians 4:2 and 3; 5:22-24
I Corinthians 1:29, 31; 13:4-9
Proverbs 12:25; 29:11; 30:18<=Finding the awe and amazement expressed in these things
Ruth (Ruth 3)
Abigail (I Samuel 25)
Abishag (I Kings 1-2)

Now...what is NOT a gentle and quiet spirit and why, as modeled by woman I have studied in depth so far (just to name a few):

Eve (Genesis 3:1-6)  Her dominance over Adam caused the fall.
Sarah (Genesis 16:1-6) Taking God's promise into her own hands, and mistreating her servant for something she could not control (Hagar honestly couldn't do anything but obey, and was 'punished' for obeying her masters)
Lot's Wife (Genesis 19:26) Couldn't completely part with her materials and comfort and paid the price for it.
Rachel (Genesis 30:1) Really rash and jealous of her sister, even though she was more captivating in appearance and loved far greater than Leah by Jacob.

In summary of my findings, having a quiet and gentle spirit doesn't necessarily come from the fact that I am a quiet individual who appears to be constantly sweet...it reflects my heart.  Just taking a few things from my long list of verses...I need to think less of myself and lose the pride, open my arms to the poor, love unconditionally, be loyal and patient, seek purity, and sing at the top of my lungs with songs of praise and thanksgiving!

Surely brings a great peace to my soul to understand that I can in fact have a gentle spirit...even if it's mostly shown in my loud exclamations and thanksgiving!